What I “Do all day” as a stay at home young wife.

Probably one of the most hurtful things that I hear is this, or something close to this: “What exactly do you do all days since you don’t work?” or “I bet your house is spotless because you just sit at home all the time.”

Well, unfortunately it isn’t that simple. Here’s what a day in the life of this young, chronically ill wife looks like.

8:00 am – Rarely does my body actually recharge when I sleep. Depending on what I did the day before it can be very painful to get out of bed and get moving. So I open my eyes and lay there to assess the daily pain scale. Is it a, ‘I just want to die’ day or is it more of a ‘I think I might be able to accomplish something’ day? During this time I also listen for my dog’s whining telling me that she needs to go outside and make my way to the front door to turn her out.

8:30-9:00 am-  After I turn my dog back in and feed her, I assess the level of oil in my hair and decide whether or not it’s necessary to waste all of that energy for a shower or just hide my hair in a bun all day. If I choose shower I must be very careful to conserve as much energy as possible and avoid passing out.

9:00-9:30– If I took a shower, this thirty minute time period is spent laying on the bed recovering from my shower and snuggling with my little four legged buddy.  If I’m lucky the closet door is open so I can pick out what I’m going to wear while laying there. If I didn’t take a shower, I wash my face, and head back to the bedroom to rest and pick out what to wear.

9:30-10:30-During this time period I head to the kitchen to fix something quick for breakfast so I can take my pills without throwing up. The breakfast has to be something quick because being without my medication up to this point makes moving quite the struggle. Instant oatmeal, peanut butter on gluten free toast, or whatever fruit is in season are some of my favorites.

10:30-11:00– During this time I rest again, finish getting dressed, and sometimes straighten up a little bit.

11:00-3:00– This is when i go to the library to work on my course work so I can get my medical transcription certification. It is such a blessing to have found this program as it is so flexible.

3:00-5:00-If I’m lucky I still have enough energy to do some basic house keeping and organizing. But unfortunately that isn’t often the case. Most of the time, i crash on the couch and try to recover as much energy as I can before Josiah gets home and I need to start dinner.

5:00-5:30– Dinner prep. I actually enjoy this part of my day. I can bring in my desk chair on wheels and roll around the kitchen a get dinner made for when Josiah gets home.

5:30-6:30– This is when we typically eat dinner, take nighttime pills, and do the dishes.

6:30-bedtime– This is when Josiah and I run any errands that need to be done and just relax together.

So before you judge me on how clean my house it. Before you consider me lazy, remember that when my heart rate is running between 85-120 at rest, my body is working twice as hard as yours. My body doesn’t even get a break when I sleep, because often I don’t get deep enough into my sleep cycles. So if you come over and my house isn’t spotless, then maybe you should call before you come. If you come over and my house isn’t dust free, remember that just because I don’t work outside the home, it doesn’t mean that I’m not working. Living with multiple chronic illnesses is a full time job.

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